By Jessica Leigh Lyons
Jessica Leigh Lyons is a coach, a facilitator, and a writer who helps people create an Internal Compass that guides them on their life path so that they can navigate big life decisions with confidence and clarity. You can find more on www.jessicaleighlyons.com.
As an elementary school teacher, my days consisted of lesson plans, laughter, and inquisitive questions by ten year olds. But when I hit burnout, I decided to make a change. I woke up to find myself in a cubicle with coffee, my computer, by myself with my thoughts. At first, I was overjoyed by the silence. That didn’t last long. As time wore on,I felt a twisting sensation of anxiety and a dull panic that never left accompanied by an ever-whispering question: What do you want?
Truth be told, I had no idea.
I started calling it the fog of uncertainty and I began searching for how we navigate through unknown times. Sometimes uncertainty arises from external events like a storm. Our partner gets a job in a new city and we move or we suffer a devastating loss of a loved one and it rearranges our world. Other times, uncertainty is like the current in the ocean. It’s internal and below the surface. We have a thought, a doubt, or a fear creep across our mind and suddenly, we feel unsure about how to proceed.
When life feels uncertain and we can’t see around the corner, many of us have a habit of getting anxious. This is normal, because ur brains are designed to be mindless. For example, you don’t have to think about when to take your next breath while you’re reading this, your brain naturally does so. If we had to think through everything that our bodies needed to function, we’d never get to put our passion into the world. However, when our brain happens across a circumstance that it doesn’t have previous data for, it panics. When we feel like we are drowning in “what if” or “what might have been”, we go back to play with “what is possible”. Choose an innocuous statement and then try three different types of responses. Let your brain shut it down and notice how you stop yourself when you’re feeling uncertain.
1. Try on your “NO”
I’m writing a blog for Ringlet Market. No, I can’t write my blog for ringlet market because I have too many deadlines on my plate right now. No, I can’t write my blog for ringlet market because I’m having writer’s block.
2. Then try “Yes, but…” I’m going for a run today. Yes, I’d like to run today, but I don’t have enough time in the schedule. because I don’t have enough time. Yes, I’d like to run today, but I don’t have any workout clothes clean. Etc.
3. Use YES, AND!
I’m writing a blog for Ringlet Market. I’m writing a blog for Ringlet Market AND I’m going to include an improv game. Yes, I’m writing a blog for Ringlet Market and I’m going to include an improv game AND I’m super excited to talk about navigating uncertainty. Yes, I’m super excited to be talking about navigating uncertainty AND to tell people that it’s NORMAL so we learn to PLAY instead of get anxious.
You can use different statements or play with the same statement. The trick here is to allow your brain to play with possibilities so that you can learn to navigate uncertainty with ease.